The catastrophe of love, where love turns into hate. Why do couples who love each other from the bottom of their hearts end up hating each other and breaking up? I will explain from the counselor’s point of view.
What is “Affection Catastrophe” where love turns into hate?
Whether I sleep or not, all I think about is him (her). I have no doubt that she is my partner from my previous life… Why do couples who are so deeply in love end up disappointed in each other and their love ends?
A catastrophic event is a tragic end of an emotional breakdown. And in romantic relationships, “love catastrophes” often occur.
Beware of catastrophes, especially if you are a passionate couple!
Affection catastrophes are common in couples who are bound together by passion. It’s hard to look at the reality of married life while you’re engrossed in love, but actual married life doesn’t always last like a dream. You often see the bad side of your partner, and you may feel like your expectations have been betrayed.
In this situation, some people are disappointed in the marriage itself. People who had high expectations for their partners tended to think, “Was my attitude during love a lie?” Disappointment can also grow and turn into hatred.
The Catastrophe of Affection in a Wife… A Husband’s Lack of Understanding Can Lead to Disappointment
Next, let’s think from the standpoint of a wife who has a child. When a wife has a child, she cannot escape from taking care of it for many years. This makes her husband’s attitude even more disturbing.
First of all, I expect her husband to work hard, support the family budget, and fully cooperate with housework and childcare. Are you spending too much of her income on your own pleasures, or are you putting home on the back burner and doing whatever you please? These things worry me a lot.
A bad intuition can make her feel betrayed by her husband and make her love catastrophe more likely.
The catastrophe of affection that arises in a husband.
Think about it from your husband’s point of view. In the first place, husbands do not have the same experience of pregnancy and childbirth as wives, and in general, husbands spend less time involved in child-rearing than wives, and it is difficult for them to notice subtle changes in their wives’ feelings through child-rearing. .
Furthermore, many husbands see their homes as a “place of comfort” where they can rest their tired wings. After working as hard as I can, I want to be freed from my obligations at home and spread my wings. Nevertheless, when the children are young, they cannot rest and have to struggle with housework and childcare. Or, even if you want to rest in the living room, your wife and children will occupy it before you know it, and there is no place to spread your wings.
When the family is in such a state, little by little, the heart of the husband grows up with painful feelings such as “What am I working hard for?” It can lead to a love catastrophe.
How to prevent catastrophe? It is important to deepen understanding through communication
To prevent a love catastrophe, couples need to talk to each other about their concerns. If you live your marriage on the strength of love, you will be greatly disappointed when your partner behaves differently than expected. When this builds up, a catastrophe of affection occurs.
To prevent this, good communication is very important. It is important that both parties share their images of married life (both positive and negative), discuss the differences between ideals and reality, and have a relationship in which they understand each other’s thoughts.
Husband and wife are life partners who go through life’s difficulties together. We are “comrades” who share many thoughts, including each other’s shortcomings and lack of understanding, think together, and support each other. For that reason, it is necessary to support each other patiently while communicating a lot.